How To NOT Give Your Neighbor A Piece of Your Mind, Fist & Neck

Morning world! Things have been challenging for me lately and I needed to take some time and read some scriptures on loving my neighbor and having mercy. When those around us at our jobs, in our neighborhoods, churches or own homes manage to get under our skin, as Christians we MUST tell our flesh to shut up and start meditating our love scriptures. Just because those around us may be acting up, doesn’t give us the license to “show our butts!!” I had to remind myself today while driving to work “these people know I’m a Christian, even though I’m frustrated at how things have been going in the office, I can’t lose my witness, it’s not worth it! This too shall pass!” I know the Holy Spirit is with me, leading and guiding me but I will only be able to hear his voice if I am in the spirit and not the flesh.

I just want to encourage you today if you are facing challenging situations that tempt you to step out of the spirit and into the flesh. As tempting as it is to let someone have it, it isn’t worth it. God won’t be pleased and it will only make the situation worse. More people will be blessed by you responding correctly than you going off on someone. 

5 Ways To Walk In Love

1. Show compassion because love is patient and longsuffering with others.

2. Celebrate the successes of others because love is not envious.

3. Promote others welfare above your own because love does not insist on having its own way or rights.

4. Refuse to be vindictive or retaliatory because love is forgiving.

5. Do not be easily provoked, but control your impulses because love is slow to anger.

http://www.ehow.com/how_5740072_walk-love.html

Checkout these scriptures about loving your neighbor and the parable about the ungrateful servant. Let us all examine our hearts and make sure we are walking in love, forgiveness and mercy. May God’s peace and wisdom be with us all this week and always!

Leviticus 19:18 Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.

Luke 10:27 He answered: ” ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’ ; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”

Matt 5:7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

Matt 18:21-35 The parable of the ungrateful servant

21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”

 22Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

23-35 The servant owed his master 10,000 talents. He begged for mercy and it was granted unto him. Then the servant came across another servant who owed him a hundred denarii. He began to chock the servant and demand that he give him his money. The servant begged for mercy and patience from the man but he refused. Other servants near by saw what happened and they went and told the master. The master called the servant wicked for begging for mercy and receiving it but not granting another that same mercy. In anger the master through the servant in jail to be tortured until he was able to pay back his debt. Matt 18:35 This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Married Christians Should Have The Best Sex

Proverbs 5:18-19 May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer— may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.

Yesterday at our married bible study at Word of Faith Southfield, we we’re reminded about how important sex/intimacy and emotional connection are in a marriage relationship. Pastor Andre Butler and Min Tiffany Butler reminded us through the word of God that GOD invented sex and sex is GOOD in God’s sight!! As Christians, we know that we are supposed to be loving, patient, giving, serving, selfless and make our mates our top priority (after God). If we truly love our mates like we love ourselves, then we would try our best to treat them good all the time. If you are married, your spouse and you are one. The bible commands us to love, respect, honor and come together in the marriage bed together often. Read 1 Cor 13, it’s known as the love chapter.

The radio today plays sexually explicit songs and majority of the music videos have turned into 3 minute soft porn flix. The world thinks they invented sex. They write and sing songs about pleasing woman after woman or man after man but we know that meaningless casual sex is hurtful and dangerous, not something to be proud of. I don’t want the world to be more bold than I on the topic of sex. I know that I am experiencing awesome love making with my husband on a regular and God is pleased with that. It’s time out for Christians being so shy, reserved and nonchalant about married sex. It’s a gift from God!

If you are married you should be having sex a few times a week at least. If you and your husband are both busy with work, ministry and the kids, then you literally need to schedule sex/date nights and go at it. Make each other and coming together a priority. Single people should not have more sex than married people. The bible speaks of married couples coming together often so that we are not tempted. I am NOT going to let days go by without me encouraging, communicating, emotionally connecting and pleasing my husband sexually. All of these things are very important and I don’t want another woman to come along and tell him how great he is and how fine he looks NO that is my job and it is his job to encourage, talk to and please me emotionally and sexually.

We must learn what our spouses needs are and then work hard everyday to meet them. When your marriage is happy, your marriage bed is happy! Some of what I shared today was points from yesterday’s married bible study on the 5 sexual needs of a husband and a wife. There was many more points so I would encourage you to go to the website and purchase the DVD, CD or MP3 http://www.woficc.com

1 Cor 7:1-5, 33-34 NIV  1Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry.[a] 2But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. 3The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. 5Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

33But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.

Grab Yo Suit Case, It’s Time For A Change

The key to change is to let go of fear- Rosanne Cash
 
There is nothing wrong with change, if it’s in the right direction- Winston Churchill
 
Life can either be accepted or change. If it’s not accepted, it must be
change. If it cannot be changed, then it must be accepted.- unkown
 
Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending- Maria Robinson
 
Women are creatures of habit. We like things to be comfortable and to stay the same and consistent but sometimes this can be a bad thing. As women we have to make sure that we do not allow fear of the unknown to prevent us from stepping out and trying something new. Read the following questions and answer them honestly to yourself.
 
1. Am I happy and fulfilled in my current job?
 
2. Am I being loved and treated how I deserve to be in my current
relationship?
 
3. Is my church teaching me the word of God and helping me to grow spiritually?
 
4. Do I enjoy my job and look forward to going to work each week?

If the answer to any of these questions is no, it maybe time for a change. God put all of us on this earth for a reason and each day that we have breath in our lungs, we are responsible for walking in our purpose and living our lives to the fullest. When God says it’s time to move, grab your bags and get to moving. He will never ask you to do something and sit back and watch you do it all by yourself. He will lead and God you through every step of the way. Seek God, yield to Him and watch Him do awesome things in your life. Don’t waste another day on a man that’s not loving you, respect you and building you up. Don’t keep working at a job that you hate and don’t keep attending a church that you know you have out grown. Seek God for direction but know that whatever He tells you to do, you got to be prepared to do.

Jere 29:13 And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

1 Cor 10:13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Isaiah 43:18-20 Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. The wild animals honor me, the jackals and the owls, because I provide water in the desert and streams in the wasteland, to give drink to my people, my chosen.

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Forget Regret or Life Is Yours To Miss

“Forget regret, or life is yours to miss” Jonathan Larson

Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can’t build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in.
Author: Katherine Mansfield 

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed-door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” Alexander Graham Bell

2 Cor 7:10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death

Regret is a horrible feeling. No one likes to think about “what if” or “what could have been.” Since we can not change the past and the decisions that we have made, we need to press to work harder, be wiser, seek God more often and follow His lead in every area of our lives. Don’t let regret of the past rob you of your future. We all need to learn from our mistakes, try our very best not to repeat them and move on in wisdom and peace.

I’m sure everyone who reads this post can name 5 things they wish they had not done in life, whether big or small things, because no one is perfect. Even though we wish we would have made better choices, it’s more productive to walk in God’s peace, grace, mercy, love, comfort and favor today, and let the past be the past.

Confessions for me today:

1. Lord, with your grace and guidance, I will be a better Child of God, wife, daughter, sister, coworker, supervisor, counselor etc

2. I will give each task today 100% and walk in a spirit of excellence.

3. I will not hold grudges against others or myself.

4. I will walk in God’s mercy, hope and peace and not live in regret.

We know that today is a good day. God is good. As long as we have breathe in our lungs, we have a opportunity to do better and be better. We will be hopeful and think about positive things. We will trust God and walk in His ways. We cast down fear, regret, anxiety and depression in Jesus name, Amen!

Psalm 118:24 This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Phil 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Phil 3:13-14 Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

If you enjoyed this blog post, I encourage you to subscribe to receive emails regarding future post. The subscribe button is located at the top left corner of the blog. Once you enter your email and hit “sign me up,” you will have to open your email and confirm the subscription. Thank you in advance for your support. Also please email the blog link to other ladies https://joannawillis.wordpress.com

Submissive Wife vs Stepford Wife

I know many people think that submission is a four letter word. In today’s society, people think a woman is weak or spineless if she is submissive to her husband but that is further from the truth. People don’t have an understanding about what submission is and what the bible says about it. A godly submissive wife is not a Stepford wife like in the movie Stepford Wives. Here are the definitions of a submissive wife and a stepford wife.
 
A Stepford Wife is 1.) Used to describe a servile, compliant, submissive, spineless wife who happily does her husband’s bidding and serves his every whim dutifully. 2.) Can also be used to describe a wife who is cookie-cutter & bland in appearance and behavior. Subscribes to a popular look and dares not deviate from that look. This term is borrowed from the fictional suburb of Stepford, Connecticut in Ira Levin’s 1972 novel, The Stepford Wives, later made into movies (in 1975 and 2004). In the story, men of this seemingly ideal town have replaced their wives with attractive robotic dolls devoid of emotion or thought. Click the link below to read more about stepford wives. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=stepford+wife
 
Main Entry: sub·mis·sion
 
Merriam-Webster defines submission as 1 a : a legal agreement to submit to the decision of arbitrators 2 : the condition of being submissive, humble, or compliant 3 : an act of submitting to the authority or control of another.
 
What does being submissive mean: A submissive wife has the inclination and attitude of willingness to yield to a husband’s authority and follow his leadership. She wants her husband to take the initiative in the family and she is glad when he takes responsibility and leads with love. But submission also says, “It grieves me when you venture into sinful acts and want to take me with you. You know I can’t do that. I have no desire to resist you. On the contrary, I flourish most when I can respond joyfully to your lead; but I can’t follow you into sin, as much as I love to honor your leadership in our marriage. Christ is my King.”
 

What the bible says about marriage and submission

Ephesians 5:22-33 (The Message)

22-24Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.

 25-28Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor—since they’re already “one” in marriage.

 29-33No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That’s how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become “one flesh.” This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.

After reading the definitions of both types of wives, the narratives and the Ephesians passage about submission, I believe the differences are quit clear. I am honored to submit to my husband because A) I know that I am pleasing God and following His word, B) I know that my husband lives to please God. He has the Holy Spirit on the inside of him and he would never purposely lead us in the wrong direction, C) Our home is peaceful because we understand what the bible says about marriage and we both know our roles in the family. Submission is not a bad thing, especially when you marry a man who has an intimate relationship with Christ, is not trying to control and dominate you, who is mature, kind, wise, prayerful and willing to seek God until he gets clear direction regarding the family’s business.

Even though I am a submissive wife, I do have a mind of my own and I freely voice my thoughts and ideas to my husband respectfully. I don’t spend every minute of each day waiting on my husband hand and foot BUT I do take pleasure in serving him and taking care of him. He also takes pleasure in making me happy and taking care of me. Marriage is a partnership, we’re a team.

What Does Submission Not Mean:
 
1. Agreeing with Him in Everything
2. Refusing to Make Choices at Odds with His Choices
3. Avoiding Every Effort to Change Her Husband
4. Putting Her Husband’s Will Before Christ’s Will
5. Getting Spiritual Strength From Her Husband
6. Acting Out Of Fear
 
 
 
Married women, I encourage you to read the bible and find out what the word says about you and your behavior towards your husband. Surround yourself with other women that love their husbands and cheerfully submit to them. If you are having difficulty with submitting to your husband, pray and seek God. Ask Him to give you peace, patience and the ability to be the wife that He called and created you to be. Submitting isn’t always easy but it is a must.
  
If you enjoyed this blog post, I encourage you to subscribe to receive emails regarding future post. The subscribe button is located at the top left corner of the blog. Once you enter your email and hit “sign me up,” you will have to open your email and confirm the subscription. Thank you in advance for your support. Also please email the blog link to other ladies https://joannawillis.wordpress.com

Drop That ZERO! 10 Tips To Ending A Bad Relationship

Most of us have dated a guy or two that we discovered was not good for us. Some of us knew our ex’s were bad for us before we started dating them, but that’s a post for another day. When you care for someone deeply and you’re used to having their companionship,  it can be hard to end the relationship, even when you know it’s a must.


I dated a guy on and off for five years from high school to the beginning of college. He was my first love and I was head over heels in love and lust with him. As I grew up and matured in Christ, I began to see that the relationship wasn’t glorifying God and it needed to end. God wasn’t getting the glory and I wasn’t being treated the way I deserved and desired to be. It was a complete act of faith and obedience that helped me to walk away from that young man. I had wrapped so much of my existence in him over the years and the thought of not having his time, attention or company was scary. I knew he was hurting me and I knew I was hurting God. I was 20 years old when I knew enough was enough. I prayed, cried and talked to my mentor. With boldness and God’s strength, I ended ALL contact with my ex. No friendship, email, text messages NOTHING’. I’m a firm believer that ex’s can not be friends. If you have emotional and physical tied to someone, how can you be “just friends,” with them? It’s nearly impossible. Don’t kid yourself. If he treats you bad as your boyfriend, WHY would he treat you good as your friend?


Each day that went by, the Holy Ghost comforted me. I became stronger and my ex’s strong hold on my heart weakened. I stepped up my prayer time and surrounded myself with sold out Christian female friends. I knew God had someone for me who was sold out for Him, honest, open, kind, compassionate, hard-working, funny and FINE! I learned to embrace my singlehood and get to know myself better. I grew leaps and bounds in Christ also. I had to learn that it was okay not have a man to talk to each night or to tell me I was pretty. I had to get in the word and see myself how God saw me. I learned to love myself. Leaving that knucklehead was one of the best decisions I ever made!


If you are in a relationship that is not good for you, I want to encourage you to listen to that feeling on the inside of you that’s telling you to end the relationship. That’s the Holy Spirit tugging at your heart. If your being mistreated, cheated on, lied to, taken advantage of or verbally/physically/emotionally or sexually abused, you need to leave. I am not talking about married people getting a divorce, I’m speaking to single ladies that are dating horrible boyfriends. Don’t worry about being lonely, you can do bad all by yourself! You deserve better. Don’t settle, have standards and wait on a good man to come along when the time is right. 


10 Tips For Ending A Bad Relationship by Wendy Atterberry


1. Stop making excuses for his bad behavior.


2. Don’t waste more time defending your mistake.


3. Remember who you used to be.


4. Set new relationship standards.


5. Believe there is someone better out there.


6. Don’t expect to be happy immediately.


7. Distance yourself immediately.


8. Allow yourself to be lonely.


9. Remember why you ended the relationship.


10. Take care of yourself.


To read the entire article on how to end a bad relationship, go to http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-10-tips-for-ending-a-bad-relationship/


If you enjoyed this blog post, I encourage you to subscribe to receive emails regarding future post. The subscribe button is located at the top left corner of the blog. Once you enter your email and hit “sign me up,” you will have to open your email and confirm the subscription. Thank you in advance for your support. Also please email the blog link to other ladies https://joannawillis.wordpress.com

No Means No: Tips To Stay Safe On A Date

In the U.S date rape is committed every two minutes. Wikihow.com lists tips to stay safe and prevent date rape. Every woman needs to know how to have fun but stay safe and be wise while having a night on the town. Rape is never a woman’s fault, no matter what she wears or where she goes. No means no!! We as women need to have a plan and be alert when we are out alone in the community. Please review the tips below and keep them in mind the next time you are out on a date. For Christian women, always pray God’s protection over yourself before you go on a date and ALWAYS listen to the Holy Spirit and seek peace. If you don’t have peace in your spirit, don’t go. If you get a troubled feeling and your out, get up and go home or call someone to get you. Never second guess yourself.

 Tips 

  • Trust your instincts! If you feel uncomfortable in any way DO NOT TRY TO NORMALIZE IT! Tell your date you are sick and about to vomit, or get out of the situation some way. Never doubt your instincts or say you are misjudging him/her. Many look back and realize they had uncomfortable feelings before something bad happened.
  • Keep your wits about you- stay sober.
  • If all else fails drink water, or mix coke and sprite to look like a drink.
  • Go to parties with a sober friend or a designated observer who is not drinking, who can watch and protect you.
  • Always carry your own car keys to get away and use as weapons.
  • Bring emergency cash for a cab ride home and don’t spend it. You may need it for other situations, like being dumped on the roadside or something. If in a foreign country, always possess the name, front desk phone number and your hotel address, (but never your room number) written in a language the cabbie will know. Leave information about where you’ll be, with whom, and when you should return to your room- and how someone might find you.
  • Be cautious of large punch bowls or drinks served by others as drugs are easily slipped into them.
  • Open your drinks yourself, and don’t share drinks.
  • If they have any sexually oriented items that make you feel uncomfortable, don’t say anything. Just get out of there!
  • Don’t go out with strangers.
  • Call your parents if you are stranded somewhere- or a friend who will help. What’s the worst thing you parents can do compared to being raped, killed, or any other unfortunate things? Never feel that you can’t call a parent or a close friend.
  • Place several people that love you and would answer and respond to your calls on speed dial. Then, if you are ever in a compromising situation, just hit one number and call without anyone knowing.
  • If the worst should happen, get to the nearest emergency room immediately. Do not bathe, change your clothes or wait until morning. This could compromise or destroy evidence that you were raped and make it much more difficult for the authorities to build a case against your assailant. Physical evidence is your greatest weapon against the person who hurt you.
  • Do not wait to tell someone what happened to you. Do so immediately. It can be extremely painful to recount the incident so soon after it happened, but the longer you wait, the greater the danger of it becoming a “he said/she said” situation, especially if your assailant is famous or well-respected in the community.

Warnings

  • If he/she starts touching tell them forcefully to stop and walk away, preferrably to a place where people are.
  • Always stay alert and aware of your situation.
  • In some cultures, Western women are perceived as “easy.” This creates many problems for traveling women, like an unexpected danger because you may not have done anything that you perceive as provocative. To be safe, NEVER ASSUME THAT THERE IS A NON-SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN A MAN AND A WOMAN- no matter what age- AND ACT ACCORDINGLY. In many cultures, men and women are never casual, asexual friends and if you assume there is a sexual undercurrent (even if it is the last thing you’d imagine) prepare to protect yourself.
  • If in a group, look out for each other and don’t let group members wander off alone or with someone unknown to the group.
  • If the offender/rapist is trying to touch or assault you, put your hand in front of you and recite “STOP IT” or kick them in their groin. Never throw a punch unless necessary, it may give easy access to assault you even more.

To read more of this article and review 17 tips on how to prevent date rape go to http://www.wikihow.com/Prevent-Date-Rape 
From National Studies Of College Women 
* 84% of women who were raped knew their assailants. 
* 57% of rapes occurred on a date. 
* 25% of men surveyed believed that rape was acceptable if: the women asks the man out; if the man pays for the date, or the woman goes back to the man’s room after the date. 
* 33% of males surveyed said they would commit rape if they definitely could escape detection. 
* 84% of male students who had committed acts that clearly met the legal definition of rape said what they had done was definitely not rape. 
* 75% of male and 55% of female students in an occurrence of date rape had been drinking or using drugs. 
* Only a quarter to a third of women whose sexual assaults met the legal definition of rape considered themselves rape victims.