To Mrs. Willis With Love


My mother in love went home to be with the Lord this past May. She was an amazing woman and it’s honestly still hard to believe that she’s no longer with us but I know she’s partying with the angels. She was an awesome cook, baker and decorator. If they threw parties in Heaven, I know she’d hook Jesus up with the most beautiful spread made with all the fixings. My MIL was full of many talents! When I thought about starting to write in my blog again, several topics and ideas came to mind. I started thinking about everything that’s happened over the past seven months and my MIL came to mind. I dedicate this post to you, Margaret Lee Willis, forever in my heart.

Dear Mrs. Willis,

I sit here tonight thinking of you. I smile at the thought of your smile. I can picture you cooking and decorating the house for the countless parties we hosted. I see you sitting on the couch singing to our daughter Elyssa and finding pure joy in every minute that you got to spend with her. You took your role as a mother and a grandmother very seriously and I’ve always admired and respected that about you.

Though it’s easy to allow myself to be sad that your no longer here, I choose to rejoice instead. I rejoice because you’re no longer in pain. I rejoice because you’re rejoicing with the angels and spending time with our Savior. I rejoice because you raised an amazing man who is the best husband and father and for that I am forever grateful. I rejoice because the Lord will give us the grace to carry on your legacy.

I wanted to say thank you for loving me. Thank you for showing me how to throw a fabulous party! From Rebecca’s Sweet 16, to countless birthday parties and even 3rd Sunday Family Dinners.Thank you for throwing us the biggest and best engagement party. Thank you for making my Tea Party Baby Shower so elegant and unique. Thank you for being so excited when Elyssa was born and for being there to help whenever we called. Thank you for being a woman of faith, a true Proverbs 31 Woman. You were a blessing to me and so many others and I thank God for the time that he blessed us with you. Because I know Jesus, I will see you again and until that day, I’ll just say, see you later.

With Love

The Dark Knight: A Case of Mistaken Identity

The majority of us know someone who has died of cancer, someone who lost a child, a couple struggling to conceive or a single mother who’s struggling to make ends meet because her saved husband decides he wanted a divorce. These situations are painful and hard to understand. No one likes to see good people struggle and often times the wrong person gets blamed for these circumstances.

Yesterday our assistant pastor brought an awesome message entitled “Don’t Blame God.” He reminded us of a few keys points that really opened my eyes on the subject.

  • The devil wants you offended at God so you will go to hell.
  • God doesn’t kill people.
  • God doesn’t “need” people in Heaven.
  • God doesn’t use evil to accomplish His purpose on the earth.
  • God sent the Holy Ghost to be our comforter in hard times.
  • Good=God and Bad=Devil
  • God does not use Satan’s tools to teach us His lessons.
  • Test and trials don’t come to teach you something, they come to take you out.
  • God does not use evil circumstances to develop your character.
  • God will send you on a mission where He knows you will be attacked BUT He will lead, protect and provide for you on that mission.
  • God will take the evil that’s been done to you and turn it around for your good. He didn’t cause the evil but He can make it your testimony because you made it through.

During my teenage years, both sides of my family lost many people to illnesses. My dad lost his father and sister. My mother lost her father, grandmother, aunt, cousin, aunt and uncle. Between 08-09 my father lost two of his brothers. The majority of those that died where believers and even though we were praying for their healing, they still passed away. Throughout all of this hurt, pain, grief and confusion, I NEVER heard my parents or family members blame God. Did we question him in our minds, were we confused when our prayers weren’t answered or we upset at the sight of our loved ones hurting, YES, but we understood that God wasn’t playing some crucial joke on us. The deaths weren’t his doing, he was loving us and guiding us through those hard times.

Sickness, disease and death are on the earth due to Adam and Eve’s fall, they are a result of sin being on the earth. God was NOT trying to teach us anything. He DID NOT kill my family members. What He did do was provide us with the Holy Ghost, who was our peace, joy and comforter as we mourned our loved ones. It was the Holy Ghost who helped us go on, who gave us the strength to push through, who sent other believers alone to give us an encouraging word. Jesus took our sickness and disease on the cross so why would He hand it back to us here on earth? It makes no sense because He wouldn’t do it.

My grandmother Ms. Rosemary Shaw, is one of my biggest heros. She was a faithful care taker to her husband as well as many of the ill family members that passed away. She got saved when my mother was in her twenties and she has been in love with Jesus Christ ever since. My grandfather suffered a stroke and hit his head on the pavement outside of his house when I was under ten years old. My grandfather suffered extensive health issues including being paralyzed on one side, memory loss and many other things. The doctor’s did not think he would make it through the night. My grandmother and family prayed and prayed and he lived for almost ten years after the accident.

Once he came home, my grandmother cared for him full-time, she changed her entire life to serve and care for her husband. She ministered salvation to him and he excepted Christ. She had nurses coming in the home and her pastor and church members came to the house and held mini church services and served them communion. My mother, her sisters and the whole family pulled together and supported my grandparents during that devastating time.

I know my grandmother as well as my mother and her sisters, struggled on the inside with all that had occurred. The daughters no longer had their healthy, active father and she no longer had her husband. My grandmother had a patient that she had to wash up, feed and clothe. She had to retire from a job she loved to care of him BUT she kept her faith and her relationship with God strong. She played gospel music and word tapes. She kept TBN on the TV. She knew were her strength came from. I know she had to question God at times but I never heard her blame him. She keep a positive attitude and she served and cared for her husband with all the love she had. I believe their relationship became stronger after my grandpa had his injury. My grandfather was a kind, smart, strong, intelligent man before the accident but he did not know God. His wife was able to minister salvation to him by her behavior, conversation and the way she cared for him. If she had been bitter towards God and him, she wouldn’t have been able to care for him like she did. She and my grandpa did not have the best marriage before the accident, but she honored her marriage vows and cared for him as unto the Lord. All of this makes her one of my biggest heros!!

So now that we know to stop blaming God for the hurtful tragedy that occur in our lives, I have one more point I want to make. As Christians, I know we need to speak the word and make positive confessions. I am a firm believer in that but when someone has suffered a great loss, we must let them grieve and let them know that it is okay. People don’t have to feel perfectly happy and joyful they day after they suffered a tragic experience or loss. We are to cast our burdens unto Jesus because He cares for us and we’re to rely on the Holy Ghost to be our comforter. Just because we do these things, it doesn’t mean we won’t go through some or all of the stages of grief and loss and that is ok. As long as while we go through the stages of grief and loss, we are continuing to read our word, pray our way through, seek godly counsel and know that God is not to blame. He loves us. He didn’t take your job to see how big your faith is. He didn’t give you cancer to teach you a lesson. Stop believing those lies and read your word. God loves you and that’s why He sent His son to die on the cross for you. He wouldn’t purposely hurt you.

James 1:13-20

 13When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. 15Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.16Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers. 17Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.

1 Peter 5:7-11

7Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.10And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 11To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

John 14:26

26But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.

John 10:10

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

 James 1:2-4

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.