This holiday season, many will consider bringing their new love interest around their family for the first time. Before introducing him to the fam, please consider asking yourself these three questions to assist you with making your decision.
1. Where is this relationship really going? Is he marriage material?
You want to know that your relationship is stable and serious before introducing him to your parents and extended family. No one wants to be the cousin that always brings a new guy around every holiday. How do you know your relationship is serious? One way is by having important conversations about your future together, marriage, children etc. I know some women fear that if they talk about their desire to get married too soon in the relationship (like during the first 6 months) they’ll run their crush away. I feel like this, you don’t want to waste his time or yours so use your dating time to get to know one another and talk about your future goals. If you let someone know that you desire to get married one day and they tell you up front that they don’t, then you know they aren’t the one for you.
2. What do his actions tell you and is he really marriage material?
Remember, actions always speak louder than words. If he says he wants to marriage you but it’s been a few years and you haven’t received a proposal, ring or set a date, chances are he’s only saying the words you want to.
Also, ask yourself if he’s marriage material. Could you see yourself marrying him the way he is today? The way he treats you, the amount of money that he currently makes etc. Does he love God with his whole heart and attempts to live a lifestyle according to the word of God? Does he love God more than he loves you? Does he have dreams, goals and motivation to be the best man he can be? Does he love, encourage, support, protect, pray, respect and honor you? Consider your answers before jumping to say that he is or isn’t marriage material.
3. Does he challenge, motivate and make you better?
Does he encourage you to discover and then walk in your purpose? Does he motivate you to follow your dreams and work hard to achieve your goals? Many of us can think of past exs that brought us down; encouraged us to skip class, lie to our parents or do things that we really didn’t want to do. It’s so important to date someone who brings out the best in you and motivates you to be better. If he’s following his dreams and working hard to make something of himself, he’ll do the same for you because he loves you. If he’s lazy and only taking from you, then he’s bringing you down and must go!!
4. Is he Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now?
It’s always a good idea to write out a list of the characteristics you want in your ideal mate. I’m not talking about looks, though looks are important. I’m talking about things that you would want your future husband to be such as in love with the Lord, honest, hard working, loving, funny, intelligent etc. If your current man’s list has some of the following words, you may consider not bringing him around the family and re-evaluating the relationship: selfish, rude, not dependable, broke, unfaithful and unmotivated. The person you date won’t be perfect, no one is, but he should have the potential to be great because of his heart and his actions. If he continues to show you that this relationship is temporary and he’s only here till the fun ends, maybe you should let him off the ride now.
So, did you like your answers about your man? If so, that’s awesome! Enjoy celebrating Christmas with your love! If he didn’t pass, let him go and don’t waste another day on a dead end relationship. Ladies patiently waiting on love, let’s continue to love ourselves, know our worth and seek God about our love lives or lack there of. There’s no need to settle or try to make someone be what we want them to be. Mr. Right will come along in God’s perfect timing, in the mean time, enjoy being single, free and happy. Submit to God, trust Him completely and watch Him do BIG things in your life!!