4 Questions To Ask Yourself Before Bringing Him Home For Christmas

This holiday season, many will consider bringing their new love interest around their family for the first time.  Before introducing him to the fam, please consider asking yourself these three questions to assist you with making your decision.

1. Where is this relationship really going? Is he marriage material?

You want to know that your relationship is stable and serious before introducing him to your parents and extended family. No one wants to be the cousin that always brings a new guy around every holiday.  How do you know your relationship is serious? One way is by having important conversations about your future together, marriage, children etc. I know some women fear that if they talk about their desire to get married too soon in the relationship (like during the first 6 months) they’ll run their crush away. I feel like this, you don’t want to waste his time or yours so use your dating time to get to know one another and talk about your future goals. If you let someone know that you desire to get married one day and they tell you up front that they don’t, then you know they aren’t the one for you.

2. What do his actions tell you and is he really marriage material?

Remember, actions always speak louder than words. If he says he wants to marriage you but it’s been a few years and you haven’t received a proposal, ring or set a date, chances are he’s only saying the words you want to.

Also, ask yourself if he’s marriage material. Could you see yourself marrying him the way he is today? The way he treats you, the amount of money that he currently makes etc. Does he love God with his whole heart and attempts to live a lifestyle according to the word of God? Does he love God more than he loves you? Does he have dreams, goals and motivation to be the best man he can be? Does he love, encourage, support, protect, pray, respect and honor you? Consider your answers before jumping to say that he is or isn’t marriage material.

3. Does he challenge, motivate and make you better?

Does he encourage you to discover and then walk in your purpose? Does he motivate you to follow your dreams and work hard to achieve your goals? Many of us can think of past exs that brought us down; encouraged us to skip class, lie to our parents or do things that we really didn’t want to do. It’s so important to date someone who brings out the best in you and motivates you to be better. If he’s following his dreams and working hard to make something of himself, he’ll do the same for you because he loves you. If he’s lazy and only taking from you, then he’s bringing you down and must go!!

4. Is he Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now?

It’s always a good idea to write out a list of the characteristics you want in your ideal mate. I’m not talking about looks, though looks are important. I’m talking about things that you would want your future husband to be such as in love with the Lord, honest, hard working, loving, funny, intelligent etc. If your current man’s list has some of the following words, you may consider not bringing him around the family and re-evaluating the relationship: selfish, rude, not dependable, broke, unfaithful and unmotivated. The person you date won’t be perfect, no one is, but he should have the potential to be great because of his heart and his actions. If he continues to show you that this relationship is temporary and he’s only here till the fun ends, maybe you should let him off the ride now.

So, did you like your answers about your man? If so, that’s awesome! Enjoy celebrating Christmas with your love! If he didn’t pass, let him go and don’t waste another day on a dead end relationship. Ladies patiently waiting on love, let’s continue to love ourselves, know our worth and seek God about our love lives or lack there of. There’s no need to settle or try to make someone be what we want them to be. Mr. Right will come along in God’s perfect timing, in the mean time, enjoy being single, free and happy. Submit to God, trust Him completely and watch Him do BIG things in your life!!

10 Tips To Making Your Marriage Bed Even HOTTER in 2012

It’s so important for us married folk to keep thinking of ways to keep our marriage bed holy, smokin hot, healthy and happy. Husbands and wives need to continue to create ways to please one another and have fun in the bedroom. Wives, let’s consider trying a few suggestions on this list to help us step up our bedroom game in 2012. You know what your husband likes and if you don’t then simply just ask him. He needs to learn your sexual desires and needs and you need to learn his. Enjoy trying new things together. Learn to let loose and laugh as you discover pleasure together. Don’t try to be anyone but yourselves. Trying new things does require a little bravery but you can do it and your husband will appreciate your thoughtfulness and attempt to take ya’lls intimacy to the next level!

10 Tips To Making Your Marriage Bed Even HOTTER in 2012

1. If your husband is into lingerie, consider purchasing a sexy outfit once a month or every other month. Men are visual and he’ll enjoy seeing his bride in somethings short and sexy.

2. Try a new position once a month. Either you can think of the position if your good at being creative or you can propose the idea to your husband and you two enjoy thinking of new ways to please each other together.

3. Practice kissing your husband longer and more passionately, whether during your intimate moments or just when saying goodbye before heading out to work. Show him with your actions that you adore him and appreciate him. A soft sensual kiss may be just what he needs to start his day or end his day.

4. Think of creative ways to initiate sex more often. Husbands like to feel desired and they like to know that we’re looking forward to making love to them.

5. Send loving and sensual text messages to your husband during the day, letting him know that he’s on your mind and you can’t wait to come together with him later. This gives him something to look forward to and he’ll be excited to know that you desire him sexually.

6. Purchase lotions or body butter to help you smell good and to leave your skin smoothly irresistible. You may even want to have some smell goods set aside only for love making so that when he smells you in certain scents, he knows it’s time to come together.

7.  Think of ways to make your bedroom more romantic such as candles, rose petals and music. Every time you two come together you don’t have to set out all the stops but every now and then it’s nice to set up your bedroom extra special and enjoy the romantic environment.

8. Try ways to spice up your four play. Only do things in bedroom that both of you are comfortable with but whatever you do, learn to sometimes slow it down and enjoy every touch and tingle.

9. Build your husband’s ego regarding how much he pleases you sexually. Tell him more often how much you love his love and love-making.

10. Ask your husband about his sexual fantasies and attempt to make them come true if you feel comfortable. Share your fantasies with him also and keep learning to please each other.

YES life is busy with careers, children, house work, church, family, school etc BUT we MUST make our marriages a priority. We must be faithful, honest, trustworthy, giving, selfless and learn to committment affectively in order to have the marriages that God intended for us to have. Sex is a very important part of marriage so don’t neglect coming together.

How Mama Got Her Groove Back

Being a mother is one of the most beautiful, intense, challenging and precious gifts in the world. I’m still amazed that I’m a mother and that God blessed us with such an amazing baby girl! I’m forever grateful to God for answering our prayers regarding becoming parents. Mommies, on the most challenging days, we must remember that some women would give anything to have a baby to potty train or chase around the house and clean up after. Moms we’re truly blessed!

Unforunately, often times us mommies lose ourselves in actively raising our children and caring for our husbands and homes. Self care is important and we must make it a habit to take time for ourselves! Ok moms, put down your brief case, dishes or the baby and listen up. Here are 3 tips to help you get your groove back!!!

1. Wear clothes that flatter your post pregnancy body. Don’t allow yourself to feel less confident or guilty because you may not be able to fit all of your old clothes just yet. Getting the baby weight off is usually a process and that’s ok. Your beautiful how you are! We must all learn to work what our mama’s gave us!!

 I’ve lost 60 pounds since having my baby girl so I have the opposite frustrating problem; ALL of my clothes are too big! I’ve had to dig through the closet for the clothes I haven’t been able to fit in years and freshen them up so I don’t have to walk around naked 🙂 The point is, when we wear clothes that flatter our body type, we look neat, sexy, professional and like we’ve got our groove back. The other day I was going through my clothes and I found a cute fitted sweater and the blazer that I usually wear with it. My husband encouraged me to not wear the blazer and to be proud of my new slim body. I felt empowered in the sweater because I felt girlie and sexy because I had on clothes that fit and flattered my shape. 

2. Start incorporating cute accessories or heels (if your really daring lol) back into your wardrobe every now and then. I just started wearing heels in October and my daughter was born in April! The main reason I wasn’t wearing heels was because I felt like I was always dragging a million things around (car seat, stroller, diaper bag, my purchase) and I didn’t need the hassle of trying to balance all of that while wearing heels. Clearly I was never a professional heel wearer because then it would’ve been a breeze! In October, we went out and I decided to wear some cute heels boots that I can’t remember the last time I wore them. It was fun to be a hot wife out with her fine husband; it was like we were dating again! We had lots of fun while Elyssa was safe at home with her grandparents!

3. For the married mommies, let’s talk about the importance of date night and sex! Even though you may be tired from the joys of motherhood and working in or outside the home, your hubby still needs time and intimacy with only you. Try to schedule maybe two date nights a month, where you and your hubby send the children away for a few hours or have a sitter come to your house and you two go somewhere. My husband and I went to grab an early dinner and then just sit at Starbucks and laugh and talk, WOW did it feel so good! I got to wear a cute purse and heels and not have to stop to nurse, change any diapers or search for her pacifier; it was great!

Ok now on to the good stuff, SEX! Intimacy is very important in marriage and no matter how busy or fatigued we are, we MUST make time to come together with our husbands. Sometimes I feel so tired but my husband’s affection and attention helps to settle me and get me in the mood. He wants to please me and I want to please him. Of course our daughter sometimes hinders our plans (I jokingly say she has sexdar like radar) but we work to get her back to sleep so that we can get back to catering to one another. I know some people reading this will think it’s TMI but I hope I’m helping to save a few marriages with my honesty. Ladies, I know some days your covered in baby food with laundry stacked to the ceiling but during those moments, please don’t push your husband away. Kindly let him know you need his help around the house or with the baby, and when the house is settled, spend some time making each other a priority. Laugh, talk, cuddle and make love frequently. Work to make your spouse your true BFF, after all, marriage is for life!!

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